Sweden's New Law: A Turning Point for Online Sex Purchases

Year after year, Magnus has spent his salary on sexual services online. Now, he sees the new sex purchase law as his chance to stop. "It feels like an addiction and it has disrupted my finances," he says.

Magnus, whose real name is different, was in the middle of a sex chat on OnlyFans when he was suddenly cut off and could no longer respond. Instead, a message appeared, citing the new law, stating that users based in Sweden are no longer allowed to send direct messages to creators on the platform.

By that time, Magnus had spent thousands of hours and kronor on pictures and videos of both half-naked and fully naked women on the platform.

He describes himself as an ordinary man in his 40s. During the day, he has various odd jobs, and in his free time, he enjoys skiing, being in nature, and photography.

He believes he may have spent around 100,000 kronor to see sexy women doing sexy things on OnlyFans. Maybe less. Probably more.

Pressured to Buy

It started when he saw a girl on Twitter, now X, where many promote themselves and link to various pay sites. Twitter was full of attractive women with big breasts and inviting looks, encouraging their audience to like, share, and comment on their pictures. Magnus paid to unlock a picture, a video, and then it just became more and more.

He can't really afford it. He wants to build up savings and not have to decline going out to eat with friends because he's already wasted his salary. But it has become like an addiction. Magnus can only describe it as an addiction.

I wonder what has made it so hard to stop if he wanted to.

"You feel pressured to buy more and more. They can be incredibly manipulative. It's like 'please, can't you buy' and they get so disappointed when you don't buy, and then you end up buying anyway, to not disappoint them. You feel bad when they get disappointed."

Has Had Sex Without Paying

He sees no reason to feel sorry for the women selling sexual services via OnlyFans. As long as no one is forcing them, it's their own choice, Magnus believes.

Often, it's the same women he buys from. Magnus experiences it as a kind of relationship, albeit virtual. They mostly chat about sex but also about other things. You get to know each other. A little bit, at least. That's how it feels.

Magnus says he couldn't imagine paying for sex outside the internet.

"I mean, why pay for sex when you can get it for free?"

So you've had sex without paying in real life?

"Oh yes, I have. Quite a lot. I haven't counted, but it's been through dating sites and sex contact sites."

What makes you choose to pay for sexual services online then?

"Well, it's mostly because you think the girl you see on X is attractive and you want to see more. You're curious about how she looks naked, kind of."

"I'm Picky"

Most of all, Magnus longs for his own family. To find someone to have children with, buy a house, maybe a dog. To live a completely ordinary family life.

Magnus has never had a girlfriend. He would very much like to, but it's hard to find someone. Magnus says he's picky. And maybe it's partly because of OnlyFans.

"You might get a wrong impression there, so you look for girls who look like they do. Maybe you've focused too much on appearance."

No Longer Daring

It's not as easy to be attracted to girls with more ordinary looks anymore, Magnus thinks. But there is a woman in real life that Magnus would like to be with. One of the girls he usually sex chats with knows this. She gives him advice on how to express his feelings. At the same time, she continues to encourage him to buy sexual pictures and recorded material. It feels a bit wrong, Magnus thinks.

When that message appeared in the sex chat a week ago, Magnus was completely taken aback. He had read that it would become illegal to buy sex online, but he never thought the law would be implemented so quickly. The girl he was chatting with quickly found a new platform with new methods to circumvent the law. On the other platform, there is a tipping function that she encouraged Magnus to use. He tipped 100 kronor, and she sent a scantily clad picture. But that's all, says Magnus. Now he doesn't dare to buy more.

"I'm simply afraid of being reported to the police. It would feel terrible. I've never been reported for anything before. I'm completely clean from that."

"It's Like an Addiction"

None of Magnus's friends know that he has been buying sexual services via OnlyFans for several years. There is a shame in it. Magnus says it feels dirty. He can't quite put his finger on why.

"I think it feels wrong to pay, and yet you end up doing it anyway. It's like an addiction, you could say."

That's why he's glad the law has now come into effect. Because now it will be easier to refrain, he believes. And that will, in turn, benefit his finances.

Have you deleted your accounts on these portals?

"No, because with some of these girls, you've gotten quite good contact even though you haven't met in real life. I probably won't continue buying but maybe continue chatting with them."

Will they continue chatting with you if you don't buy, do you think?

"No, no, I don't think so. Not in the end."

How does that feel?

"Well, then it will have to be that way. I'm not sad about it."